5 Things to Do To Forget Your Ex
BreakupClarity App
I scanned my room from left to right - all remnants of our relationship - the teddy he gifted me on Valentine’s day, the t-shirt I once borrowed from him but never returned, the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. poster stuck to my wall that he got for me seeing my obsession for the show, jhumkis carelessly lying on the table that he so love when I wore, happy photos of us together- in a beach and a restaurant and ME! I felt like a remnant of the relationship we had. I didn’t have clarity as to what to do about this.
Breaking up is hard and forgetting your ex is even harder. Whenever I found myself in trouble, I felt like calling or messaging him; whenever I received good news, I wanted to share it with him- old habits die hard! In moments of exquisite desire, I fantasized about him. In other couples, I saw him and me. This constant void started bothering me and I resolved to forget him and the relationship. But it is not easy.
I wished there was a button. Press it- feeling on! Press it- feeling off! But life does not come with a switch on-off button. Forgetting a human being- (erasing the traces of his love, his touch, our romance, and our good times together, those feeling, our differences, our issues, those arguments that kept the relationship together and those arguments that compelled us to part ways)- is an exhausting process beyond words. But it is important. And therefore, every day I worked on myself and got better clarity as to what to do. Here are a few things I did to forget my ex:
Stopping to keep a check
Exes and crushes make you the best stalker ever. The temptation to know everything needs to be controlled at all costs. Out of sight, out of mind is a real thing. It also saves a lot of time going into overthinking after the stalking expedition. I stopped searching for him on social media and also told my friends to not tell me anything new about him that they may know from any sources, even if I insisted on knowing.
Memory modification
I associated a lot of things, places and activities with him. And for a long time, I avoided all those to protect myself from the memories and the subsequent pain. But I chose to change the narrative. For instance, I went to those places again without him- alone or with other friends. This helped me realize the beauty of those things or activities (that I once enjoyed with him) was permanent and true even without him. I attached newer memories to those and it became easier to forget him
Gave me the closure I expected from him
It’s so futile to wait and expect anything after a breakup. I wasted a lot of days waiting for that closure. Many people, like me, keep waiting for closure from the side of their ex. A conversation. An apology. An explanation. This is without the realization that closure comes from within you and not from any other external source, mostly. As I said, there is no on-off button, one has to be patient. If you think about forgetting your ex all the time, you are always thinking about him. Do not force yourself to forget him. Trust the process, the journey itself to give you that clarity.
Tried talking to new people
To each one their own, but talking to new people helped me in saving myself from biting loneliness. Many times we miss the validation that a partner gives us. We miss being noticed or being talked to. Maybe don’t jump straight to dating, but do not restrain yourself from talking to new people. After months or years of relationship, talking to anyone new can feel very different, but it sure keeps the excitement and curiosity alive in you.
Gave me the reality check often
Make a list of all the reasons that led to your breakup and go to that list the moment you miss the relationship too much. This helps in keeping you in touch with reality. Eliminate any remnants of the relationship that constantly remind you of him. Now I don’t endorse burning gifts, tearing letters and destroying photographs. Even the idea sounds violent to me. But for some time, try to keep them away from your eyes. Give away things you do not use or hide them from yourself. You must, in your heart, know and accept that it is over! Acceptance after a break-up is good for your emotional wellness and mental health.
For whatever it is worth, forgetting an ex is a liberating process. It frees you from the chains of old memories and opens you to newer, better experiences. Remember, even our body doesn’t keep wounds forever- it heals over time and makes every effort to erase or lighten the scars that the wounds gave us. It tries to forget the pain, the wound and the suffering, and so we must too. Clarity App played a huge role in this process. I talked over with their listeners and got a proper understanding of the issue. Their listeners gave me advice that helped so much. Call or chat, they helped me in every possible way and strengthened me so that I can finally move on.
5 Things to Do To Forget Your Ex
Breakup
I scanned my room from left to right - all remnants of our relationship - the teddy he gifted me on Valentine’s day, the t-shirt I once borrowed from him but never returned, the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. poster stuck to my wall that he got for me seeing my obsession for the show, jhumkis carelessly lying on the table that he so love when I wore, happy photos of us together- in a beach and a restaurant and ME! I felt like a remnant of the relationship we had. I didn’t have clarity as to what to do about this.
Breaking up is hard and forgetting your ex is even harder. Whenever I found myself in trouble, I felt like calling or messaging him; whenever I received good news, I wanted to share it with him- old habits die hard! In moments of exquisite desire, I fantasized about him. In other couples, I saw him and me. This constant void started bothering me and I resolved to forget him and the relationship. But it is not easy.
I wished there was a button. Press it- feeling on! Press it- feeling off! But life does not come with a switch on-off button. Forgetting a human being- (erasing the traces of his love, his touch, our romance, and our good times together, those feeling, our differences, our issues, those arguments that kept the relationship together and those arguments that compelled us to part ways)- is an exhausting process beyond words. But it is important. And therefore, every day I worked on myself and got better clarity as to what to do. Here are a few things I did to forget my ex:
Stopping to keep a check
Exes and crushes make you the best stalker ever. The temptation to know everything needs to be controlled at all costs. Out of sight, out of mind is a real thing. It also saves a lot of time going into overthinking after the stalking expedition. I stopped searching for him on social media and also told my friends to not tell me anything new about him that they may know from any sources, even if I insisted on knowing.
Memory modification
I associated a lot of things, places and activities with him. And for a long time, I avoided all those to protect myself from the memories and the subsequent pain. But I chose to change the narrative. For instance, I went to those places again without him- alone or with other friends. This helped me realize the beauty of those things or activities (that I once enjoyed with him) was permanent and true even without him. I attached newer memories to those and it became easier to forget him
Gave me the closure I expected from him
It’s so futile to wait and expect anything after a breakup. I wasted a lot of days waiting for that closure. Many people, like me, keep waiting for closure from the side of their ex. A conversation. An apology. An explanation. This is without the realization that closure comes from within you and not from any other external source, mostly. As I said, there is no on-off button, one has to be patient. If you think about forgetting your ex all the time, you are always thinking about him. Do not force yourself to forget him. Trust the process, the journey itself to give you that clarity.
Tried talking to new people
To each one their own, but talking to new people helped me in saving myself from biting loneliness. Many times we miss the validation that a partner gives us. We miss being noticed or being talked to. Maybe don’t jump straight to dating, but do not restrain yourself from talking to new people. After months or years of relationship, talking to anyone new can feel very different, but it sure keeps the excitement and curiosity alive in you.
Gave me the reality check often
Make a list of all the reasons that led to your breakup and go to that list the moment you miss the relationship too much. This helps in keeping you in touch with reality. Eliminate any remnants of the relationship that constantly remind you of him. Now I don’t endorse burning gifts, tearing letters and destroying photographs. Even the idea sounds violent to me. But for some time, try to keep them away from your eyes. Give away things you do not use or hide them from yourself. You must, in your heart, know and accept that it is over! Acceptance after a break-up is good for your emotional wellness and mental health.
For whatever it is worth, forgetting an ex is a liberating process. It frees you from the chains of old memories and opens you to newer, better experiences. Remember, even our body doesn’t keep wounds forever- it heals over time and makes every effort to erase or lighten the scars that the wounds gave us. It tries to forget the pain, the wound and the suffering, and so we must too. Clarity App played a huge role in this process. I talked over with their listeners and got a proper understanding of the issue. Their listeners gave me advice that helped so much. Call or chat, they helped me in every possible way and strengthened me so that I can finally move on.
